Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

Psalm 139: 14-16

¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

¹⁶ your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

~3 weeks ago my life changed. 3 weeks ago I experienced love in a whole new way. 3 weeks ago Rachel Lael Collins was born into the arms of Jesus where she entered our hearts... mine will never be the same. 3 weeks ago my friends Jeff and Sara shared their most precious gift with me, and I have never been so blessed.

Dear Rachel,

On the way to the hospital that morning I had no idea how my life would change. Never would I have dreamed that someone who never experienced life on earth could bring so much love. Your name means 'Innocent lamb of God," and that you are! Your mommy and daddy love you and were so proud to share you with your family. Your big brother Tyler couldn't get enough of holding you, and your sister Kayla kept saying how beautiful you are...she is right, you were incredible. Your sweet little toes, and those adorable hands I couldn't get enough of...you were fearfully and wonderfully made, so special that God kept you for himself :)

We new you were strong Rachel! You fought for 39 weeks, staying with your mommy, your mommy was so brave and you and her share a bond nobody can take. When your mommy asked me to take your picture I felt incredibly blessed to know that she wanted me to share this time with your family and to remember you. You were held in our arms all day, countless kisses, tears, as well as some laughter were shared and everyone in that hospital room felt God through you. I could never write enough to tell you how much February 27, 2010 changed me, how that day will always be a reminder of you, and how every time I am reminded of you I will remember God's plan and God's incredible gift of love through you.

6 days later we celebrated the 39 weeks that you fought for time with your mommy. We celebrated those weeks of excitement and hope you gave to each of us. We celebrated how perfect you are, what a gift you were, and what a blessing you will continue to be. Your mommy and daddy and family released 39 balloons at your graveside ceremony....it may have been the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. We had so much fun watching the wind take your balloons away until we couldn't see them anymore. There was unbelievable sunshine and blue skies that day, forever a reminder of you smiling down. Your mommy and daddy are still so proud of you and love sharing your story! You will forever be remembered, forever be loved, and forever be in our hearts. I love you Rachel! ~Erin

~here are the photos from the ceremony where Rachel's family released her balloons. 39 balloons, for 39 weeks of life. Each balloon carrying a message from a family member as well as contact information for her mom and dad to see where they traveled. This was one of the most beautiful moments I've ever experienced and I am forever changed.

I captured this moment between Rachel's Sister Kayla and cousin Megan during her ceremony...sweet innocence.

One of the balloons escaped early :) Just couldn't wait to fly

Tyler was so in awe, watching his sister's balloons fly!

The best big sister I've ever met...so in love with you Rachel!